Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
