Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I need to calm my uterus...
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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