who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
