u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize