hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
