It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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