I must be too annoying 4 u.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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