i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Even my vagina gasped.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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