Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I'm at about main and main street
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Randomize
