Jerry, you need to find god
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
