laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
