New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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