so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
