Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Randomize
