woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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