She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Randomize