Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
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