CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
