Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Randomize
