hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
