i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
