The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
