Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
