Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
