But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
