Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize