no, he came in my armpit
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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