I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Randomize
