The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Dicks are not precious.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Randomize
