he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
