We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
