I wannas sexs uuuuu
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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