Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize