Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
