Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize