Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
sick fucks of a feather flock together
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
