just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
