i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
