i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
