come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
