she sounds like chewbacca in bed
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize