i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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