We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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