Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize