just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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