He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
