you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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