maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
She's the barista slut.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
