woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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