is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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