Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Randomize
