It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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